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New Normal

It is said that you only learn when you step out of your comfort zone. Sometimes we don’t get the choice to make that move, but we are shoved into the pain of it nonetheless, with no warning or chance to get our footing. This was how that day went for me. As many times as I have shared this over the years, I still feel the gut punch just the same and cry with the last few lines. I will keep sharing it, even with the pain, because I know I'm not alone and neither are you.

I remember the warmth of the fresh early morning sun

and the cool soothing water on my skin.

This was my comfort after all, where I could find my center.

As I attempted to settle myself, I closed my eyes and had to remind myself to “breathe”. Incomplete thoughts exploded in my head, heart, and soul.

I felt the delicate spray chill me to the bone,

and I was brought back to my disgusting new reality.

You see, several hours before this everything I knew,

or thought I knew was shattered.

It was the thing that turns your insides out.

The pain that should make your heart stop.

The air became heavy.

In my lungs.

All around.

Colors were muted.

Everything was wrong.

I was completely numb while feeling absolutely everything.

Tears flooded my face and the only thought I had was, “I can’t make it. Today is the last day.”

But I made it, as much as I didn’t think I would or cared if I did.

If I’m honest, it can be iffy even now.

It doesn’t matter what the cause was, I didn’t get a say either way.

“It” can be anything. It is chronic pain, loss of loved ones, sadness, anxiety, and flat out depression for me.

And have no doubt, “it” is something that we all have in common.

You are never alone in “it”.

Some days are harder than others.

When it’s a hard day and you can’t breathe, you can keep going, or stop.

So I keep going, just for today.

Tomorrow can be dealt with tomorrow.

You only have the choice on how to respond.

That’s it.

No more.

No less.

I know I will stand taller again some day.

If someone says they are struggling or going through it, it’s ok to ask if they wanna chat or remind them that you have their back. Leave out comments on how things could be worse or comparing their situation to something else.

Sometimes reaching out can take more courage and strength than imaginable, and that makes some of us shut down completely.

If you truly knew what it was like to hang on to a ship in rough water by only your fingernails, you would do your very best to make sure nobody else feels that way.


We recognize our own;

you are not alone.


My world shattered and I didn't think I would make it through the day. Years later, I'm still here, stronger, but not the same. If I can do it, so can you. I have faith in you!


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